


without teethmarks we're left with only teeth

by Whoops_heck



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Abuse, Angst, Bokuaka - Freeform, Break Up, M/M, One Shot, Sad in general, Unhappy Ending, idk anymore, kind of, sad akaashi, sad bokuto
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-29
Updated: 2017-05-29
Packaged: 2018-11-06 07:03:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 735
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11031084
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Whoops_heck/pseuds/Whoops_heck
Summary: Loving someone is hard.It's difficult and scary and sure as hell not always a plesent experience.But you love them, so it's worth it.But harder than loving someone is living in an unhappy and lonesome relationship. Knowing deep down that neither of you have that spark anymore. Having the realization that you are not happy.Harder than falling in love is falling out of it.





	without teethmarks we're left with only teeth

**Author's Note:**

> So basically I've never written Bokuto and Akaashi as an actual like couple in their own, so I thought it would be fun. Naturally everything I touch dies so this became and angst-fest.
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

You don't leave hickeys on my neck like you used to. The red that reminded me of biting into watermelons and wiping juice of our chins is gone. The watermelons are too. We don't go to the farmers market anymore and you don't leave hickeys.

We were the dream couple. Still are, our lives are perfect and our teeth are straight. But when the door closes to the public, you don't leave teethmarks along my neck.

We are powerful people. Images of grace and modesty. We are charming, no one cab doubt that. A painting conveying masks of perfection. Brushed on with precision.

You used to fold me origami lillies. Letting me know the power hadn't gone to your head. That you were still there. Still fighting against the social expectations and requirments necessary to hold the power of the world in your hands. I filled in your fingerprints with tears of joy.

The teethmarks you left on my skin made me remember the love. Remember the man behind the porcelain mask. Remember the feeling of warm hands and warmer mouths.

Without teethmarks, we're left with only teeth,

And the shell of what we used to be.

We don't go to farmer markets, you don't fold me lillies, and my skin is left bare and pale. Out there for the world to see. And it sees.

It's eyes glaring and peering in on every personal detail. Every shift of your eyes. Every flinch I can't cover up. Every slip up and mistake is raw and there for the taking. The world is greedy.

It takes and it takes and it takes.

Leaving nothing behind but shattered hearts and skinny girls who think they're fat.

The world is greedy and the world is cruel.

You don't leave hickeys like you used to.

But you do leave bruises.

The flaws on my skin covered up in perfectly matching foundation. I cover you up. I cover what has become of 'us' in a thick layer of makeup no amount of rubbing alcohol can remove.

So I smile with straight teeth and tell everyone that I'm fine. Well no, not exactly that. Telling someone you're fine has the exact opposite effect. Fine means miserable. Fine means unbearably sad. Fine means I'm not fine at all.

So I tell people I'm doing well. And they believe me.

You don't leave hickeys on my skin and when the door closes I don't make eyecontact.

If you force my chin up I don't resist.

You don't leave teethmarks along my collarbone but I still miss your touch.

No matter how rough or unforgiving.

The house has drained itself of life, edges sharp and clean, dishes free from the sink, not a spec of dust or grime lives within four walls. 

It's a shame.

It would have been a nice home. It would be home of laughter. Of spilled wine. Of messy kitchen adventures. Of hickeys.

It would have been a nice home.

But it is only a house.

You don't love me like you used to.

And I think don't love you anymore either.

You don't leave me hickeys and I don't leave you snall smiles, cups of tea, letters about the small ins and outs of your day. I don't leave you on the edge of your seat. I don't leave you breathless.

I don't leave you a goodbye letter, I think you know the explanation already

I leave you with determination in my very soul.

And I'm not coming back.

 

\-----

I wake up to silence and know what it means.

It means my dear Keiji has finally left me.

I knew it was bound to happen. The spark I lit behind his eyes had dulled and the life we once shared died with it. I didn't love you enough. You didn't love me either. Not in the end at least. We were simply star crossed lovers who followed our compass' North. Except my compass was stuck in one direction and yours wouldn't stop spinning.

We were stars blazing in the sky destined to burn out.

We were temporary.

And I knew it.

I knew the moment I woke up that you were gone.

That what we had was gone.

I just held my breath and sat in the darkness

Relishing in your name one last time.

Goodbye, Akaashi Keiji

My smile reaches the silence and I knew I'd be alright.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm thirsty for comments, what's new


End file.
